My mom called me this morning and said, "Alyssa, there's no hope." I said WTF are you talking about? I'm right here!
My name is Alyssa Hope. For 20 years my family called me Hope-LYSS like Alyssa, and it took me that long to figure out how to stop being hopelyss and start being fearlyss.
I was hopelyssly devoted, just like Sandra Dee, except not to God or myself or love or anything positive. I was devoted to my suffering. To my depression. My anxiety. My victimhood.
I don't believe in labeling people victims. I believe in survivors. And we're all surviving, everyday on this planet, regardless of how much or "little" you think you've suffered. Surviving requires a hopelyss devotion to yourself, your success, and a fearlyss approach to life.
Being fearlyss doesn't mean doing scary or unintelligent things. Being fearlyss means being centered in your integrity. Being non-reactive, and using response-ability to respond from an open heart instead of a closed one. If you need hope, let me be your hope.
I live at the corner of Division Street + El Reposo street, literally, that’s our address, and metaphorically.
El Reposo means to “rest” and a lot of us think “rest” is “lazy” or “inactive.” We’re programmed to think “hustle” is all that’s worthy.
Rest is the most important part of being a human.
Rest is life.
Rest is active, rest is healing, rest is restorative.
Everyday, I have to choose to restore harmony in myself, otherwise I experience division.
Remember Kurt Angle and the 3 I’s? Intensity, integrity, and intelligence? Integrity is what being “Fearlyss” means.
what you say
what you think
what you do
is in alignment with who you know you are.
If you know you are loving, kind, and generous, are your thoughts loving about yourself? Are you kind to yourself? On the inside?
“As within so without.” That means how I feel on the inside affects what I experience on the outside. AKA- you feel shitty on the inside, you experience your day and events as also shitty. You feel amazing on the inside? That’s when even the shitty stuff looks not so bad.
Instead of focusing on the “division” going on outside of us with politics and news and all the things- what if we ALL focused on not having division WITHIN us. That’s the revolution that will change the world.
I’m at the corner of division and El Reposo street everyday- this is a practice to learn not to be divided against myself.
If managing a band taught me anything it’s that life is practice- not a performance.
And everyday when I stand at the corner I can choose “El Reposo” street- I can choose to REST in MY own integrity, and restore harmony within myself.
I love to watch wrestling but I’m done wrestling with myself. Managing @waylandtheband reminds me to stay in tune so I can play in harmony with everyone else.
Life is always talking, even in street signs.
Before you think that I have gone to the dark side, I invite you to #lyssten. Alyssa 3:16 says: "DTA, Don't Trust Anybody." Technically, Stone Cold Steve Austin said it, but we're going to borrow it here.
Don't trust anybody doesn't mean to be cynical. It doesn't mean to put walls up around your heart. It doesn't mean not to let anyone in. This is the complete opposite of what DTA means.
Don't "trust" anybody means to open your heart wide enough to let in compassion and understanding when you realize that we are all humans and we are all doing the best we can.
We have all experienced trauma. We are all survivors no matter how "good" or "bad" our life has seemed. We are all surviving on this crazy wonderful planet and we overthink. We don't think at all. Sometimes we're lost in the moment sometimes we miss multiple moments right in front of us. We self sabotage, we screw up, we make mistakes, we make statements that don't really reflect who we are, and sometimes we don't even know why.
It takes practice every single day to work on becoming in more and more integrity with yourself. Remember Kurt Angle's 3 I's? Intensity, Integrity, and Intelligence will get you far, but not unless you practice them.
When you trust that no one will ever hurt you or make a mistake or betray you or do you wrong, you are doing you and them a gross injustice. You are expecting them to be perfect and expecting yourself to have perfect conditions to respond to, and that's not how life on this Earth works.
Giving people the benefit of the doubt, and lysstening to them, to what they're saying AND what they're not saying, helps you to learn to trust YOURSELF. It helps build your muscles of discernment so you can Stone Cold Stunner any negative thoughts right out of your own brain.
Practice trusting life. Trusting that people are doing the best they can. Trusting that your intuition is growing even right now as you read this.
Alyssa 3:16 says don't trust anybody, but compassionately love and understand everybody.
Tomorrow is the election, and quite frankly and probably one of the most important elections in history. The energy is heavy, dense, chaotic, and everyone is feeling it, if you're political or not. It's obvious that our country + our collective experience is facing feelings of uncertainty.
When asking someone how to "manage" the election, it really comes down to remembering there is a difference between management and control. If I were to control my artists + my bands instead of manage them, the relationship wouldn't last long.
Life is about relationships, and we have to look at our relationship with the election. If we are obsessing over, taking out our aggression on, blaming, or being angry at it, our relationship is going to be very unhealthy and toxic. If within our relationship, we do our part, which is to manage our response-ability, we will be in a harmonious relationship with whatever happens.
To take response-ability is to use your ability to respond instead of react. It's your willing to trust in yourself which helps builds trust in your relationship. Can you trust yourself to manage your responses? Your responses, which is to say- your words, thoughts, and actions- create your life.
As an individual, you on your own cannot control the entire outcome of the election. You cannot control how your peers react, what society does, what happens on television, or anything that is on a collective scale. Attempting to control these things will leave you feeling powerlyss, and you should never be the victim in your relationship.
Although you can't "control" the election, you can manage yourself.
You can manage how you respond to the results.
You can manage how much time you spend watching the television.
You can manage how much time you spend reading comments on social media.
You can manage your response to the results, manage your response to those who disagree with you (even if they are less than kind) and manage how much of this is affecting your overall well being, and how much you are allowing to impact your mental health.
If the election doesn't "work out to your favor," this doesn't have to be a death sentence. This can be an opportunity for you to determine what you can do. To change the world, you don't have to be the President Of The United States, you just have to be the President of yourself. We are each invited to self-govern ourselves, our emotions, our decisions, and our choices, so we can change the future, quite literally.This starts with us, at home.
The more emotionally regulated, self- trusting, centered, and discerning people there are, the better, brighter, happier, and less divisive our future will be.
Black and white, right or wrong, republican or democrat, are really binary and limiting ways of thinking. The future will not be one or the other. It can't.
The future will embrace the grey. Groupthink or to only be in community with those who agree with us is dangerous.
Disagreements and difference of opinion allow for innovation, creation, and change. It allows for expansion and growth. Being able to talk to people who are different than you and who have had unique life experiences is enriching. It's rejuvenating. It's what America is all about.
Manage your thoughts. Manage your emotions. Manage what you can do to be the change and embody the difference.
To "manage" is to make things "manageable." Trust that in the relationship between you + the election, you will know exactly what to do no matter what happens. Because you will.
On my 18th birthday I went straight to the tattoo shop as soon as they opened at 11am. It was my friend’s mom’s shop and I knew exactly what I wanted: “HOPELYSS” across my back in Old English.
Why? Because it was 2007, tramp stamps were hot, and my name is Alyssa Hope so “hopelyss” was all my family called me for the first eighteen years of my life.
I thought it was the best idea. My friend’s mom, not so much.
She tried talking me out of it for over an hour and half because why would anyone want to be branded “hopelyss” for the rest of their life.
13 years later and I don’t brand myself “hopelyss” anymore, but it does serve as a constant reminder.
In each moment, am I being hope-lyss, or am I being fear-lyss? And I’m able to pivot from there.
Choosing to be fearlyss doesn’t just mean facing my fears and doing things I don’t want to do.
Being fearlyss means being neutral. Not reacting. Not allowing anything outside of me to control my response- which is both my ability and my power.
Being fearlyss gives me options, and options are how I create my world.
For 18 years I was hopelyss. Even longer than that.
I still have moments of hopelyssness that occur in my day to day, but I never stay there for long because I remember that I have a choice, and I choose to be neutral.
I choose to observe. I choose to use discernment.
I choose to be fearlyss.
The Beatles are confirmation to me that God exists.
I love God. I believe in God. And I know that there is a God.
I also know that I am not your God. And I know you are not mine.
We make a lot of things our God.
Money. Relationships. Partners. For some people even the weather is their God.
We let a lot of things and a lot of people have complete control over our life and its outcomes.
When I tell you what you SHOULD or NEED or BETTER be doing, I’m acting as if I’m your God.
I’m demanding. I’m in charge.
I’m not your God.
When you tell me what is best for ME, what I MUST do, you are forcing your will on me.
You are not my God.
I don’t need to tell you what to do or how to do it.
I can trust that you know exactly what is best for you. I can #lyssten. I can offer. I can invite.
You can say no.
Invitations show trust. They show respect.
They show belief in humanity and honoring individual and unique paths and journeys.
“YOU HAVE TO ______ vote, help, donate, wear this, sit here, eat that” or “you’re an awful person” isn’t inviting.
It isn’t welcoming. It isn’t inspiring.
It feels like we’re wrestling with each other instead of making music together.
I love a good heel promo as much as the next guy but this storyline’s played out guys.
The attitude era is over.
John Lennon said “imagine.” He asked you to “give peace a chance,” he didn’t demand it.
He trusted you. I trust you.
Can we pick up where John left off?
Can we let go of controlling everyone else in a false attempt at security because we feel like we can’t control ourselves?
Can we trust that everyone is doing the best they can?
Can we use compassion as a compass and guide ourselves back home to our hearts?
Can we lyssten with our hearts?
I’m asking, not telling. I’m inviting, not demanding. RSVP is not required but as always is appreciated.
Can you imagine this? Can you give it a chance?
You're full of shit.
You're full of shitty feelings, shitty insecurities and shitty thoughts about yourself.
Literal shit, waste, that is literally wasting space in your body, heart and mind.
You're holding on to this shit and it's making you sick.
It is literally toxic to your being.
Let that shit go.
And when you're healthy, shit happens a few times a day.
You release this shit. You let it go. It doesn't consume you. It doesn't hurt you. It doesn't make you sick.
You're able to release it and move on, unaffected. Natural. Normal. Healthy.
Sometimes, you release it, and you still need help.
Do you need a plunger? Do you need to dig deeper and see why shit's getting stuck?
When shit gets so bad do you need to call a plumber?
An expert that can help you go even deeper to see that it's beyond what you can see on the surface?
We feel like shit is embarrassing, but shit happens to everybody.
It's the most natural, human thing everyone experiences.
We've all dealt with shit.
But shit doesn't have to hurt.
It doesn't have to be messy.
It can be easy. It can be normal.
Don't hold your shit in.
Don't let your shit consume you.
Don't be full of shit.
Alyssa 3:16 says, when the world is on pause, you can still play! Play with your friends, play with your dog, play with your kids, play your music, just play! Take advantage of "the pause" and get connected to yourself. Playing, being, enjoying, and living is the prerequisite for shaking your ass and saving your soul.
Today's Can I Please Speak To The Manager Video is live on YouTube: Click Here To Watch
This video didn't come from a Wayland fan, but a wrestling fan, and if there's two things I know about, it's music and wrestling.
Love shouldn't feel like a wrestling match. It should feel like a concert where two people are in harmony. To love is to #lyssten, and lysstening to your heart requires the courage to expand when the muscle of your heart wants to contract.
If you have experienced heartbreak, this video is for you.
to screw a screw into a wall, it requires recognizing where its going (a goal) turning in, up, and around (changing directions) it even requires getting it tighter (more focused) to reach success (stability.)
so screw you! know where you’re going, change directions frequently, and trust that no matter how wobbly it feels at first, security is coming!
alyssa 3:16 says, screw you.
💿 music- through the fire 🔥 @waylandtheband